Sacred Pilgrimage: A Guide to Jewish Practices on Death and Mourning

I. Foreword Rabbi Alvin Fine´s beautiful and inspiring prayer in Gates of Repentance reminds us that: Birth is a beginning And death a destination And life is a journey… A sacred pilgrimage to life everlasting. Properly understood, death is a stage in the journey of life. The recognition that life is finite and that death […]

II. Introduction The Jewish approach to death and mourning is guided by four basic principles: 1. Recognition of the reality of death 2. Moderation in grief 3. Respect for the dead 4. Equality in death It is in accordance with these principles that the laws, customs and practices of Judaism have developed. These reflect, in […]

III. Before Death Comes Last Will and Testament Every adult should have a will, a legal document in which one disposes of one’s material assets. Some people think of a will as necessary only if there is a large estate or when death is imminent. Such assumptions are mistaken and can have awful consequences. No […]

IV. In Time Of Illness Visiting the sick One of the acts that Jewish tradition declares to be both an obligation and a deed whose reward is immeasurable is bikkur cholim, visiting the sick. Those with a life-threatening illness have a special need and desire for the support of loved ones and friends. A smile, […]

V. From The Time Of Death To The Funeral Service Prayers after the death of a loved one When one is present at or is informed of a death, the following prayer is customary, along with such other prayers as the heart may prompt: Barukh Atah Adonai, Eloheinu, Melekh HaOlam, Dayan HaEmet. Blessed are You, […]

VI. Making Funeral Arrangements Consulting the Clergy The Temple’s rabbis and cantor are available for counsel, advice and help, before and after a death. They are anxious to help you and will make every possible effort to accommodate their schedules to your needs. If you wish one of them to be involved in the funeral […]

VII. The Funeral/Memorial Service And Burial/Interment The service includes prayers, psalms and a eulogy in memory of the deceased. Participation by family members or others and the inclusion of additional readings or music should be discussed with the clergyperson who will be officiating. Such participation is not traditional and, in any case, should not be […]

VIII. After The Funeral And Interment After Burial As mentioned above, after burial or cremation, the focus shifts from paying appropriate respect to the deceased to easing the pain of the living. Jewish traditions and practices define periods of mourning and ways for the bereaved to gradually reenter the stream of life. Upon Returning from […]

IX. Mourning Observances Shiva / Seven days of mourning In Hebrew, the word shiva means seven. When used in connection with mourning, it connotes the seven day period that commences the day of the funeral. During the shiva period, it is customary for mourners to refrain from ordinary pursuits and occupations and remain at home, […]

X. After Shiva Sheloshim After shiva, normal occupations and family activities are resumed. During the remaining portion of sheloshim, the thirty day period that commences on the day of the funeral, it is customary to refrain from public entertainment and parties with music. It is permissible to plan for and attend such events as a […]

XI. Resources The Temple – Tifereth Israel – 216-831-3233 Chris Fox, Director of Operations: ext. 109 (After hours, she can be reached at the number on The Temple’s voicemail recording.) Berkowitz, Kumin, Bookatz Funeral Home 1985 South Taylor Road, Cleveland Heights, OH 216-932-7900 Mayfield Cemetery Mayfield Road and Coventry Road, Cleveland Heights, OH 216-321-1733 Contents […]

XII. Bibliography A Time to Prepare , UAHC, Phila. PA Freehof, Solomon Reform Jewish Practice , Ktav, New York, 1976, pp. 115- 183 Gates of Mitzvah:A Guide to the Jewish Life Cycle , CCAR, New York, 1979, pp. 45-64 (A Reform Jewish approach) Greenberg, Sidney, A Treasury of Comfort , Wilshire Book Co., N. Hollywood, […]

XIII. Acknowledgements With thanks to the following rabbis and congregations for generously sharing their guides to Jewish mourning practices: Rabbi Arnold Fink z”l, Beth El Hebrew Congregation, Alexandria, VA Rabbi Bennett Miller, ANC Emeth Memorial Temple, New Brunswick, NJ Rabbi Chaim Stern, Temple Beth El of Northern Westchester, NY Rabbi Cary D. Yales z”l, Temple […]